Thoughts on Manny Ramirez

I am completely fascinated by the Oakland Athletics this year. After signing Yoenis Cespedes earlier in the offseason, they have now signed Manny Ramirez. That Manny Ramirez. I love it. The A's will be a thrill to follow all year long. Some other thoughts on Manny going to the A's.

- I love that Manny will be labeled a mentor for this young A's team. Manny Ramirez! A MENTOR! Uproarious! Manny Ramirez would have a tough time tying his shoes without help!

- There has never been a problem with performance enhancing drugs in the San Francisco Bay area, so why should we worry about Manny being tempted? Oh, yeah.

- I can't wait to hear people call him "Man-Ram". So terrible.

- I love that this will be Yoenis Cespedes impression of America. Manny Ramirez, Coco Crisp, Oakland. I am going to love the A's this year.

Thoughts on Yoenis Cespedes

According to Tim Brown at Yahoo!, the Oakland A's have surprised everyone and signed Cuban defector and future star Yoenis Cespedes. The Miami Marlins were supposed to be the frontrunners for the 5 tool player who now has Dominican citizenship. This raises great many questions.

- Is smuggling Cuban outfielders the new market inefficiency?

- Will there be a rash of Yoenises being born in the Bay Area?

- Do the Marlins feel especially hurt by California this offseason, having lost Pujols to the Angels and now Cespedes to the A's? What's next? IS Jeff Conine going to the Giants? Greg Colbrunn to the Dodgers?

-Where does the rest of the A's payroll go? They have a payroll of 15 million a year, right? That's 6 million to spend on 24 other players!

- He was reportedly close to signing with Miami after touring the new stadium. Does he prefer empty soulless venues, like the one in Oakland? Maybe that's why he was even considering Miami. Probably didn't realize they were building a new stadium.

- Unless... Oakland is building a new stadium for suresies, and Yoenis just..... knows. Maybe?

- It's said that Cespedes signed with the A's because Oakland wanted him most. I think we should go ahead and call Yoenis Cespedes Whistle Tip in honor of the last thing Oakland really wanted.